Mooshy I love my kids post, you have been warned! 😂

Well just look at that. March already!? This year is whizzing past! With it being a sparkly new month and all I thought I should really try dropping in a little blog post as I'm not doing very well with my write a post a week resolution....

 Today it's been pretty crap weather wise so it blew out any plans we had made that included being outside. Me and both the boys were at home, no plans no nursery no errands. These type of days are a real blessing I think. A chance to catch up on stuff or just relax together without watching the clock and worrying about being late for everything (which I usually am!)
Anyone who knows my boys knows that they fight like cat and mouse. Everything is a competition. Who eats more food, who gets up the stairs first,  who makes the biggest tower the list goes on and on. Generally I leave them to fight it out unless they start actually fighting and they need pulling apart.... Danny is quite sneaky and winds Connor up quite a lot or tells Connor to do naughty things, which he does of course. Connor is quite chilled out but will be the one throwing the first punch when he is pushed too far.  I'm not sure what came over them today but they have been lovely! Helping each other and minimal squabbling. Let's hope it continues!  I've been feeling a bit crap lately I've had a chest infection that turned into a sinus Infection, which was awful! Seriously gross. That's almost cleared up now so today I really wanted to spend some one to one time with both boys, as to be honest, I've been getting through the last week or so with the help of movies, kids kindle fire and the promise of cake and milkshake. All so I can grab 10 minutes of sleep before I start drowning in my own snot again. Being a mum and being ill really sucks.

Danny loves reading and he had grown bored of short stories so I brought him a few chapter books. I thought Roald Dahl stories would be a good place to start. I loved them as a child so I really enjoyed reading them to him. We started off with the twits. He found it hilarious in the beginning chapters describing the twits (especially Mr Twit's beard full of old food!) and the tricks they played on one another
..the worm spaghetti and the glass eye in his beer were his favourites. I love how Roald Dahl can create words and they are both perfect and totally ridiculous such as the Frumptious freaks! We finished it today, it was lovely to see him so excited about finishing the book and finding out what happened to Muggle wump and the roly poly bird! I think we will read fantastic mr fox next or Danny champion of the world. Danny is obviously desperate to read the one about 'him'!  I'll look forward to reading these again to Connor, for now he is more than happy with the gruffalo (seriously I can recite that in my sleep!)

Something they can both agree is brilliant fun is making forts, tents, houses out of blankets and pillows. They especially love tucking a duvet behind the sofa and hanging over two dining chairs placed at the front of the sofa. They can hide under here and pretend it's their house. They only come 'over to mum's house' aka come into the living room for food and to watch TV. Which I suppose is how they will act as teenagers as well!!

They both love anything crafty and messy. Danny got some air hardening clay for Christmas and has been asking to use it since boxing day! Today they made pots for Mother's day. They really listened to me and made some pretty good little pots! Danny's first attempt of a small pot with  'a sausage and a pea' inside really did make me laugh though!

Danny is crazy on letters at the moment so we made this mummy sign together too, and Connor and I made a Jerry mouse as he's bonkers for Tom and Jerry!  I'm looking forward to painting them at the weekend once they are all dry!
We made Peppa pig and minion cupcakes (nothing fancy, packet cakes!) and Connor helped me to wash up (after his man and boat had had a paddle of course!)

They were so lovely today and now they are both snuggled up in bed I'm all warm and fuzzy about how lovely today was. How proud I am of my little boys,  and how quickly they are growing up.

 Danny starts school (actual uniform wearing Monday to Friday big boy school!!) in September and Connor will start nursery next month (argh!!!!!) These days are numbered as the next steps for both of them will be here before I know it and days like today will just be fond memories. Maybe that's why I wanted to write about today and cement it in my mind a little....

Okay, I'm getting all mushy now and I'm fighting the urge to run upstairs, put them both in sleepsuits and cots, give them bottles and turn on baby TV nightscreen whilst rocking them to sleep again!

Of course not all days are as lovely as today, some days I just about manage to make it till bedtime and feel like screaming into my pillow and banging my head against the wall. But today was a good day and I'm really feeling blessed tonight....even if I have just found Connor asleep in my bed for I'm sure the first of many times tonight!

Crazy stuff! Till next week!

Thanks for visiting! XxxX

Another lesson learnt

I just want to start this evening by saying thank you so so much to everyone who has read, shared and commented about what I've been writing!  I'm enjoying it so so much. I love having something to think about again. I have wanted to do something like this for ages but just thought I'd never have anything remotely interesting to write about! It humbles me that so many people have even clicked on what I've wrote, let alone read it! It's doing wonders for my self confidence and I really do feel like I'm finding myself again a little more after each post. My head is buzzing with little ideas, I may even start writing little stories or poems or something.  Maybe. Baby steps Grace!

Now, I read a lot of parenting blogs. I particularly love  Scary Mommy I love how blunt and easily relatable this one is, and The Bubblelush  is a written by a lady who has her own very young children and is also a foster mum. I came across her when I was looking into becoming a foster carer.  She is an absolute angel. One day I'd love to be like her.
Anyways, I came across this post from Fatherly  http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/8248234
And it is pure genius, 100%.  When I first began to read it..treat your child like an adult my initial thought was... Errrr you serious!? But it works! It so works. I really needed some help with Danny. And this was it!
A little background..  Danny is 4 next month (oh my god!?) and he is super freaky. Honestly, he is scarily intelligent. I'm not just saying this because I'm his Mum.
You can have full blown conversations with him, and have done for ages. He can recognise words and numbers, write his own name as well as Mummy, Daddy Connor and Jade (his key workers name). At his last parents evening at nursery she even said to me she is having to get work for him to do from the reception class because he can do everything they have in the nursery!?
 He was walking by 10 months old. I can't remember him ever not talking, he was fully potty trained day and night by 2 years old.  He can work a self timer on a camera. He dresses himself, gets himself ready every morning. His understanding of the world is ridiculous for his age and he hates anything that should be at his level programmes etc because he says they are boring! He loves documentaries about animals and dinosaurs and when I let him choose a dinosaur book to buy (he LOVES Dinosaurs) He was insistent on an encyclopaedia and loves looking at all the pictures and when I read it (I can barely pronounce half of it) to him. Stuff we have brought for him for his birthday / Christmas is meant for at least double his age. He's basically a 7 year old (okay, maybe not quite but just to try and explain him) in a 3 year olds body.
However, this does have a downside. He gets bored so quickly. When he's bored he reverts to what I call the Danny monster. He screams, shouts, pings about,  he plays with one thing and quickly gets bored, he winds up Connor something rotton and that leads to fights. He tells Connor to do naughty things and starts getting really.....arseholey!! He's a lovely boy don't get me wrong,  he's polite and very very sensitive but he needs and craves constant attention.
Back to the article.  As I was reading this Danny was popping into my mind over. We have a few behavioural approaches. He has a sticker chart for eating his dinner (he's a sod for not eating his dinner, it's too hot,  this bit looks funny blah blah.) He would rather talk about complete nonsense or something like "mummy why is the dogs poo orangey and mine is brown" at the dinner table.. Ergh. It's quite exhausting answering 1000,000 questions a day!
 The chart only works because he wants to complete the picture. It's like a sticker jigsaw chart. If he is particularly awful he gets sat out on the step which he hates and just gets angry about...and will try to have a debate with me about how grossly unjustified it is. Seriously, he's exasperating!

 At nursery they have a "black cloud" which is basically a traffic light system, but my word he's terrified of it. He is the best behaved little angel at nursery because I think he would be totally hysterical and refuse to ever go back if he ever got put on it. One of his friends got put on it last week for something totally unrelated from him and he was distraught about it! Burst into tears as if she had been put in the chokey or something!? (They don't have one of those at his nursery!) I think it's more the public embarrassment of being naughty than anything else.
Danny and I can clash, which leads to power struggles, which are silly really and just remind me of the I'm big you're small argument in Matilda (must have Matilda on the brain today!?)  I just felt that the step at home was just frustrating him more. After reading the article that day I thought back on the entire day and really tried to think how I acted with the boys, Danny in particular. I wouldn't let him help me with chores, told him to be quiet and to wait a minute loads and loads of times even said oh why can't you just go and play with something for a minute and leave me in peace (argh bad Mummy).  I cut his food up, picked his clothes and brushed his teeth. I pretty much chose everything for him. Wow, how annoying! How did I not realise what a total control freak I was being! Poor boy no wonder he was frustrated and playing up. He wanted my attention and I was snipping at him for no real reason. I felt a bit shit.
 Today we were at home all day, so I saw it as my chance to try this treat him like an adult stuff out. He chose his outfit (although I did have to persuade him to get dressed at all because he said well why do I have to, I got dressed yesterday!? )  I let him help change and make the beds, yes it took longer and no it wasn't as neat as I do it but wow he was so excited and pleased with himself!  He helped me wash up, Connor did too and water ended up everywhere but it was funny! I gave him the chance to choose what we all did this afternoon,  a choice of something arty, a film or all playing buckaroo. He picked arty so I got out the clay and I made a leaf with Connor but let Danny do his own thing. He asked me to help him make a leaf too. We all made a pumpkin tea light holder and with the remaining clay he made a 'pumpkin face' it was hard not intervening but I'm glad I didn't because he did it and it was really good!

 He helped me fold the washing and even  though I had to re do the lot he loved sorting the socks. He even helped make me and Craig coffee! I had to hold back and not take over when he wasnt getting the right amount of coffee or sugar on a teaspoon. Seriously, I'm so controlling apparently!!  He was so amazed when I said he can lift the kettle. Turns out he makes a pretty good cup of coffee!
Now I'm not going to just let him do whatever he wants or let him try out all kinds of dangerous activities. I'm his Mum not his buddy and I'm raising gentlemen not hoodlums!  It could of been a fluke but by giving him some of the control he reacted by giving me the respect and attention he should. Respect is a two way street after all. I wing this parenting malarkey every day and I'm always willing to learn and take advice. All I can do is my best for them :) From this I've learnt that actually he is a fully fledged little person with his own thoughts, wants and feelings. That my little Danny diddles doesn't need me to do absolutely everything for him anymore. That I need to let go of him a little, loosen the apron strings, that he isn't a baby anymore. That my little boy is much more capable than I allow myself to believe
That my little boy..... Is growing up.

XxxxX